Star Wars: The Force Awakens

Starring: Harrison Ford, Daisy Ridley, John Boyega, Oscar Issac, Lupita Nyong’o, Adam Driver, Peter Mayhew, Carrie Fisher & Mark Hamill

Directed by: J. J. Abrams

Rating: ★★½

I’m going to begin this review by saying that I am not a Star Wars fan. Yes, I watched them as a child, but I never really took to them. For me, they were always fairly boring and forgettable, and I much preferred other franchises.

A cool new robot!

Space just ain’t my thang.

Returning characters!

But of course I had to see this new sequel, mainly because it was one of the biggest cinema events of the year, but also because I accompanied my dad- who was much more excited about going than I was.

And I thought it was okay- it’s just a typical Star Wars film.

A cool new Stormtrooper!

Set 30 years after The Return of the Jedi, there’s a new villain in town- Kylo Ren (Driver) - an enemy of The Force as annoying as his crappy name. And he has a larger army of evil doers, a bigger Death Star, and has also embraced the Dark Side.

An annoying new villain!

Can he be stopped by a plucky team consisting of scavenger Rey (Ridley), deserting Stormtrooper Finn (Boyega) and the indomitable Han Solo (Ford)?

A brand new Jedi!

Can a courageous crew of mismatched individuals save the galaxy from the forces of evil?

Lots of action!

Sound familiar? That’s because it is. In an effort to restore the franchise to its former beloved glory, Disney did a copy and paste job with the script. With a story almost identical to the original Star Wars, Star Wars: The Force Awakens has space ships, new worlds, aliens, Jedis and lightsabres, It is essentially a rehash of the original trilogy, almost certainly guaranteed to appease the ravenous fans.

The Millennium Falcon!

And yes, maybe I’m being too cynical, but it is directed by uninspiring cookie cutter director Abrams- best known for copying everyone else’s style whilst never having one of his own- who does a good job of making it look exactly like everything that came before it by taking exactly zero risks. 

Disney was not going to jeopardise this franchise, and they also intentionally left gaps in the world’s continuity so they can have sequels, prequels, spin-offs and whatever else they can do to milk this cash cow.

Gender equality!

And it seems to be working- for now- as Star Wars: The Force Awakens is currently  6^th highest grossing movie of all time.

  

And as harsh as I’m being about the film- there is actually quite a lot I liked about it.

Not only is John Boyega a great actor, he also plays a great character- who is, for the whole, a comic relief sidekick, who steals the show. I really rate Disney for allowing a brother to get a break.

New dilemmas!

It’s great to see Harrison Ford back as Han Solo- but it really shows how desperate Hollywood is for new stars as there is no one to replace the ageing elite.

Harrison Ford!

But that’s what happens when you cast people based purely on looks and nepotism.

More heroes!

I really liked Poe Dameron (Issac) even though he doesn’t get enough screen time, and BB-8 is a great little robot- unlike the annoying C3PO.

The original robots!

And as much as I respect Disney for taking a risk with the lead- by having a kick-ass and smart woman who is thorough developed as a character- Ridley is very annoying to begin with, as her drama school acting is grating. She is very similar to Keira Knightley- which is not a good thing- but luckily becomes more likeable throughout the duration of the film.

More desert settings!

I cannot say the same for Adam Driver who is entirely bland and boring as the new villain. Whereas Darth Vader was terrifying and you liked to hate him, Kylo Ren is whinny and forgettable.

Darth Vader's skull for some strange reason!

There are some good action scenes, and some great moments between the cast, but Star Wars: The Force Awakens is largely a paint-by-numbers job that was created to make more merchandising money for Disney. 

More space ships!

And although the ending is more annoying than shocking, people will almost certainly be lining up to see the sequels, prequels, TV series, web series and whatever else they can think of to keep that steady stream of income flowing in.

So, all in all, Stars Wars: The Force Awakens is just another Star Wars film.

Take that as you will, and may the fortune be with you- or with Disney.